Embers eternal but we’re a ways
from raging with the fire
Roll another one and take me back
to other alleys, streets more lit
other lives more lived, more alive
when I soaked myself in rum-laced coke
with lime, for you a line
and we laughed
oh the laughter
it was intoxicating, wicked
so fleeting yet so divine
For the post-sober night prolongs your smile
it brandishes an afterglow
I’ve learned to catch
with the corner of my eye
Winning when I’m losing
myself, losing myself – for what?
It’s all sparks, this
like a puff of your breath on a winter’s morning
Sparks, this
kindling that comes to nothing
nothing but the heat from your cigarette lighter
rubbing up against my calloused thumb
Sparks, this
evaporating into emptiness
Y’know it’s electric at the edge
of the void, the adrenaline
that surges at the mere
thought of falling
falling
Could you?
Could you capture all my dreaming
my longing to be consumed?
I’m dry until I’m swept away
I’m free when I am lost in you
If I close my eyes hard enough
could you pressure my heart till it buckles?
Till you drench me
douse me?
Till you undo me
undress me?
I (sigh)
Just (must)
Feel (real)
Something (anything)
Even pain validates the breath in me
Breath and beat
in, boom
out, boom
in, out
boom, boom
this rhythm I cannot control
this music that writes me
into here
and
now.
Header image: Swaraj Tiwari.
